Just walk away

I've never felt so much despise or abhorrence for any person in my life. When you put on your nice persona, you are GOOD. REALLY GOOD. too good for words. but when you put on your negative persona, you are way too mean and intolerable. When times get tough, i sit with a false hope that you will change... but you never do. I'm so over playing your game.


The bruises you left on my arms yesterday are nothing compared to the bruises you're leaving on my heart. No matter how many times i fell to the ground and got my face scraped on the grass, it was nothing compared to how you make me feel inside--you didn't even care that i was getting hurt, instead you laughed and enjoyed it.
You're so disempowering, you have no idea how frustrating it is,, i can't even begin to explain it. I put out my all and got hurt, and you're just fine. i'm going out of my mind. LITERALLY. i'm going crazy. i'm confused. The compass seems to point straight ahead, but just as i'm about to persue my path, the bearing changes and i'm once again left confused and hopeless.


I've said it a million times before, but this time i'm for real: I'm just gonna walk away. walk away from you. and when some other girl comes to claim your heart (which, no doubt, will happen) I'm just going to smile and act like everything is ok. I'll fake it till i make it (even though i'm not 100% sure i'll make it). i'm putting on my bravado and leaving you behind. I don't know where i'm going or what i'm going to do, but i bet whatever i do will be better than being with you. So i'm gonna just walk away...



After we're finished with laser tag tomorrow, this is the mask i will be putting on--the mask that hides how i truely feel. So take a good look tomorrow, coz once we're done, this mask will go on and never come off. Well. Not for you, at least.