Ugh. i feel terrible.
Tonight we had a christmas picnic-dinner with family at the temple and i ate too much desert... i feel so guilty right now D: i so badly want to stick my finger down my throat and puke it all out, but i have a phobia of vomiting. I really wish i didn't have this phobia; it would make me feel a whole lot better.
I guess my fears are what keep me alive and healthy. if i didn't have a fear of something going wrong if i cut myself or a fear of vomiting, maybe things would be remarkably different :/
I want to lose 3 kg so badly. it's not that i think i'm fat or anything, because i don't think that, but i just want to be skinnier.
Also, something else i'll admit: i've been waiting since thursday for a text message from you, or a call. every time my phone rings or beeps i get excited that it might be you, but i just keep getting disappointed :/
Patience has never been a strong point of mine. I guess i'm just going to have to wait for the "31st" to arrive.
No comments:
Post a Comment